Mistakes We Knew We Were Making
by WP
Summary: Willow gets the chance to do a little time travelling and try and correct a certain death. It's Donnie Darko inspired. Heavily features Willow, Tara, Buffy, Dawn and Xander. RR
1. Default Chapter

Mistakes We Knew We Were Making  
  
"What if you could go back in time, and take all those hours of pain and darkness and replace them with something better?"  
  
"Then things might be right."  
  
"There is no right or wrong, only what you create."  
  
"What do you want in return?"  
  
"I want nothing."  
  
"What do you need?"  
  
"Why are you so untrusting?"  
  
"Because nothing in this world is trustworthy."  
  
"That can change. You can take away the evil, reinstate who should be."  
  
The red head swallowed hard. "Then send me back."  
  
Willow sucked in a breath. It felt like she was just waking from a nightmare but when her vision came into focus she saw Tara. It took very little time for her to realise that Tara was wearing the blue shirt and jeans she wore on the day she died and that she was approaching the window that in turn killed her. It felt like her brain and body couldn't move fast enough to satisfy her screaming inner voice.  
  
She pulled Tara out of the way and saw Warren waving a gun at Buffy and Xander. She quickly summoned her power and knew she didn't have time to deal with Warren so she TK'd her best friend's face down on the grass.  
  
The double blast still rang through the summer air. And the window still shattered along with her hope. But this time, it wasn't so unjust. This time it was she with the bleeding gunshot wound to the chest and she was ok with that.  
  
As soon as she hit the ground Tara was at her side, gathering the petite red head in her arms.  
  
"Will?" She asked in a terrified voice. "O-oh g-god." She cried as she took in the blood spilling out of her girlfriend. She reached out a shaky hand and attempted to put pressure on the horrifying wound. That's always what they told you, 'keep pressure on the wound.'  
  
Willow tried to offer her distressed soul mate. "It's ok." She said comfortingly.  
  
"N-no. Will. Oh god. Please d-don't leave me." She cried desperately.  
  
Willow tried to gain enough breath to talk. "I love you... so much." She reached up her pale hand to cup her lover's cheek. "This is right... You're the something... better this world needs." She eventually got out. Soon the blood lose became too much and Willow's view of the sobbing blonde began to fade to black.  
  
Tara was in shock. What the hell did she mean?  
  
"Will, Willow look at me!" She screamed without the hint of a stutter. She shook the red head but still got no response. "Please no. Don't die. Don't leave me." She whispered incoherently.  
  
She started to weep, crying out painfully as she held Willow close to her. 


	2. Chapter 2

AN: Hey! so it's been a long time for this fic but I've gotten back into it. So hopefully you guys will too. Have fun, R&R.

Part 2

Xander ran up the stairs of the Summers house when he heard shouts of anguish. His heart was racing, Buffy had sent him in to call the police and check on Willow and Tara. He knew in his heart the crying wasn't Willow's.

Running to her room he burst in to see Tara clutching Willow, sobbing like He'd never seen anyone cry. He stopped dead. Willow. His best friend since he was 5. She couldn't be gone.

He wasn't letting that happen so he quickly ran back down the hall and grabbed the phone and dialled 911. He answered all their questions on autopilot, all he could think about was Willow. He'd kill that bastard Warren. Before he had time to think about killing Warren in detail the police arrived closely followed by the ambulance.

Buffy roughly handed over Warren while Xander lead the way to Willow. They quickly tried to detach Tara and get to their patient, which Xander successfully helped with. He led her outside finding that she was too distraught to put up much of a fight.

As he got Tara out of the door he then had to catch Buffy before she went steaming in. She didn't need to witness paramedics working on her best friend.

Buffy began to fight against him but quickly told herself to stop, that now wasn't the time. Xander was surprisingly calm but when she looked into his eyes she saw just how terrified he was. And Tara. Her heart broke when she looked at the sobbing blonde. She had slid down the wall and sat hugging her knee's, hands blood stained.

Buffy kneeled down in front of Tara. She was thankful for her slayer coping abilities right then, she'd be no use if she fell apart. She gently stroked the side the Tara's head in a comforting motion. She took Tara's bloody hands and began to stand up. "Let's clean you up." She said quietly to her.

Tara's body seem to comply though her mind had no idea. All she knew was Willow was dead or dying and that she was dying along with her.

Buffy led Tara to the bathroom, leaving Xander to stand guard. She knew Xander didn't need her yet but Tara did.

She put on the taps at the sink and guided Tara's trembling hands under. The water began to flow red and Buffy's eyes welled with tears but she wouldn't shed them, not yet.

Tara also had a bad reaction to the red river and dived for the toilet bowl. She threw up everything in her stomach. Buffy sat behind her and held her hair back trying to sooth the blonde.

When she finished she fell back against and her sobs broke the air again. Buffy wrapped her arms around her shoulders. She tried to make comforting sounds but she knew it was useless.

Xander once again burst into the room. "They're leaving. I'm going with her. You take the car to the hospital." He said in a rush but Buffy didn't miss his meaning. He didn't want either of the girls to have to sit there and watch Willow fight for her life in the back of an ambulance.

Xander had come and gone in seconds, not long enough for Tara to even know he was there nevermind what he said. Buffy also wanted to protect Tara from seeing Willow carried out of the house on a stretcher in god knows what state so she waited another few minutes before trying to move Tara.

She carefully let Tara lean against the wall and shifted so she was now sitting in front of her. She took the distraught woman's face in her hands to make eye contact. "We have to go to the hospital, ok? Can you do that?" When there was no response she added. "Tara, I know. But we have to be strong for her right now."

Tara slowly gave a nod.

Buffy tried to give her a reassuring smile. "Come on." She said as she helped Tara to her feet then led her swiftly by her room and down to the car.


	3. Chapter 3

AN: Thanks for the reviews. This parts a lot longer thankfully. Have fun.

Part 3

The drive to the hospital was long and silent. Both women sat quietly with their own fears. Tara could only see Willow, bleeding in her arms. Her whole body was numb but she had a horrible feeling in her stomach, like someone was kneading her insides.

She wanted to stop the car and drive in the other direction. She wanted to turn back time and go to a time when Willow was her love and all she saw was that beautiful pale face and vibrant red hair.

She thought back to the room, the morning, the night before. It was all so perfect, they'd been thriving in ecstasy after the reconciliation. Then it was all ripped away in one horrible little bullet.

Willow seemed to no what was about to happen. She pulled her away from the window. How could she know Warren was out there?

"We're here." Buffy said gently as she put a hand on Tara's arm to try and grab her attention.

Tara numbly got out of the car and walked alongside Buffy to the entrance. When she got to the doors she understood what it was to be vampire and not be able to enter a door way. It wasn't because she was soulless or evil but because she was scared of what lay within.

Buffy was half way through the door when she realised Tara was missing.

She looked back and saw the lost expression. "Tara?" The same unregistering eyes.

She stood right in front of the Wicca so she couldn't help but look at her. "We have to go in there. I… We need to see if she's ok."

Buffy wanted nothing more to just run in and demand some answer but she couldn't and wouldn't leave Tara alone.

Buffy gently tried to pull Tara along with her to find that it worked, it seemed to start her up again.

She quickly found her way to Xander, making sure Tara was right beside her the whole time.

Xander jumped up from his seat looking as frantic as Buffy felt. He done the Xander job and wrapped them both in a huge bear hug. He didn't want to let go. If they stayed like that then they wouldn't have to deal with anything bad.

A man cleared his throat from behind them causing Buffy to almost pounce on him. "I'm sorry to interrupt, I'm Doctor Grant, I was dealing with Miss Rosenburg."

"Was!" Xander shouted at him tearfully.

"Until she was taken up to surgery. Miss Rosenburg is alive. Right now she's in the OR. The bullet pierced her lung and is dangerously close to her heart. She's seriously ill but stay hopeful for her." He let the information sink in and patiently waited in case they had some questions.

"How long will the surgery take?" Buffy asked flatly.

"Anything up to 3 hours I'd say. It's a very delicate procedure."

Buffy nodded. "Thank you." She said automatically.

The doctor gave the three shell-shocked young people a sympathetic smile before leaving them.

All stood there staring blankly ahead until eventually Tara's legs failed and she just let herself sit on the floor.

All she could think about was Willow being somewhere in the building, hurting dying, surrounded by strangers and white walls. She would be so scared. Tara wished she could be at her side, just sitting with her, giving her some level of comfort.

That's when it happened.

Tara could feel something. It was sensation she always knew was there but never acknowledged. She could feel something that didn't belong to her but at the same time was part of her.

It finally struck her. It was Willow. She was feeling Willow.

Her chest immediately ached. Not in the way it had been since she watched her soul mate get shot but it physically hurt. She could feel how fast her heart was beating. She could feel the blood all trying to go to the wound. It was a feeling that really made her nauseous, it just wasn't right.

She tried to gain something more, to get some kind of message from Willow but she could only feel her.

"Tara?"

She tried to ignore the voice and the hands that were gently shaking her but they wouldn't give up. Her vision slowly returned to reveal Buffy and Xander right in front of her, staring with a mixture of worry and questioning.

"I felt her." She could almost see Xander's dirty thoughts.

Buffy just looked confused. "Tara, are you ok? You completely spaced."

Tara put her head in hands and tried to take a calming breath. "I was connected to her. I could feel what she felt." She said quietly still not looking up.

Xander and Buffy shared a look of astonishment and soon realised it was stupid for them to doubt the connection.

"How was… Is she… I mean…" Xander stumbled over his phrases in fear of the outcome.

"She can't feel it. She's not aware of… anything." Tara said knowing what Xander was trying to say.

Xander ran a hand through his black hair and got to his feet before silently pacing in front of the two women.

Buffy couldn't do this. It was bad enough Willow was hurt and she was in real danger but she couldn't hear how bad the wound felt. She stood up, "I have to go and get Dawn. I'll come straight back. Call me if you hear anything." She told them before leaving as fast as she could.

When the slayer got to the car she put her head on the steering wheel and let herself cry.

Her best friend was going to die. Her best friend could already be dead. And she had to go and get her little sister and tell her another person in her family was seriously injured. Then she had to be strong for every one of them because she was the Slayer and that was her job. She couldn't be emotional or fall apart. Even when every part of her being told her to.

As Buffy left the hospital, 2 cops entered and approached Tara and Xander.

Xander was angered that they dare show up at such a time. It was obvious what Warren had done so why were they at the hospital?

"Mr Harris and Ms Maclay?" One of them asked.

Xander answered, "yeah." Immediately.

"We're here to get a statement from you both about the shooting this afternoon."

Xander could feel himself getting angrier, none of them needed this. "That bastard shot her. The End."

"I know this is a hard time but we need those statements and the sooner They're taken the better." One of them explained sympathetically.

Xander checked to see if Tara was paying attention and when it was clear she wasn't he quietly said, "You're not going to get anything out of Tara right now. Buffy isn't even here. Can we do this tomorrow? Its too much right now." He explained hoping to get them to back off for a while.

The cops shared a glance before one spoke up, "Ok. Just get down to the station sometime tomorrow. I hope Ms Rosenburg is ok."

He shook their hands, "Thanks."

When they left Xander sat down next to Tara and looked at her. She was almost invisible, unmoving, just blending in. Her eyes were so sad. He put a hand on her knee to try and get her attention.

Tara looked at Xander and saw the fear she felt. "Thank you." She told him before they went back to silently waiting and worrying.


End file.
